Kids Crash Video

Arbonne Kids

So after the 8th try of making this video the kids came in and crashed my one woman video making party.  The results were too hilarious not to share… and let’s face it, their version is WAY better! Click Here to check it out.

(Arbonne is the vehicle that is going to take us into a debt free life.  If you want more information about how Arbonne can help you live a healthier life or if you would like to help us by becoming a Preferred Client or booking a workshop, you can check out my web page.  http://JenniferMillerTucson.arbonne.com  I would love to share Arbonne with you!)

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Invisible Baby, Comin’ Through!

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Every now and then my husband requires the family vehicle to drive to his occupation where he can make the numbers for our bank account go up, so we can buy Om-noms for our tummies.  Which leaves me with the responsibility of walking our tiniest offspring to his Preschool where he begins to learn about those same numbers which will help feed his little pack of humans, someday.

This walk is pretty brutal in Arizona during the summer months, so I don’t do it.  I just DON’T. But now that fall has arrived is was a chilly 70 degrees at 6:00am this morning.  By the time we left the house at 7:45am it was already 79 degrees.  Dang, Arizona heats up fast!  The Preschool is only 1 mile from the house, which is was a 15 minute window to contemplate whether I should leave the stroller there or not.  I mean, it would just be stupid to walk an empty stroller back to the house only to walk the empty stroller back to the preschool in less than 3 hours.  However, when I got there, everyone else was taking their empty strollers with them.  I knew I couldn’t leave my stroller behind.  I was going to have to walk that little ‘b’ all the way home. The long lonely walk of awkwardness.

Thankfully, I’ve been blessed with a sense of humor.  So when I rounded the corner to see a bunch of teenagers waiting for the bus I knew I was in for some fun.  You see, teenagers are notoriously and unnecessarily serious… and dramatic… and teenage boys are the worst when it comes to smiling or laughing.  I pushed that empty stroller right into the midst of them and said, “Excuse me.  Pardon me.  Invisible baby, comin’ through!”  One teenage girl openly laughed!  I couldn’t believe it!  My plan to make a teenager smile had been a success!  The others smirked and one kid looked at me like I had just farted in his face, but in the end.  I made a teenager laugh today.  Not too shabby, Jennifer, not too shabby.

Next week, I should rig the stroller with a floating hat.

Still Not Your Mom

This. Just. Happened…

(phone rings… I answer)
Me: Hello? Hello?
Girl: Mom. I need you to bring my homework. I left it on the kitchen counter.
Me: Um, I cant bring you your homework becaaaauuse… I’m not your mom.  Im sorry, but I think you have the wrong number.
Girl: (pause) Mom! Don’t be mean.  Just bring it to Mrs. #####’s class.
Me: Still not your mom.
Girl: *click* (hangs up)

So I decided to text her.  That’s what a nice person does, right? *teehee*

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Apparently ]p0 = emoji of mouth sticking tongue out with spit

My 4.5yo steps into the role of “John”

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More Tongues Being Stuck out…

I might check in on her later. You know…being a nice person and all. (sticks out tongue pppp)

(Posted on Tumblr as well)

Hilarious Mothers Day Happenings

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My 4yo is making me look like the WORST mom ever! For Mothers Day he wanted to draw me a Walking Dead picture. He commissioned his father to do the work and it was completed under John’s direction.

Yes…that is a mushroom cloud in the background.   John is a soldier with big muscles and a machine gun and the baby is his “older” brother.  Dad is totally missing (must not have survived the first wave). Zombies apparently come in two types, humanoid and cockroach.  Could the Apocalypse get any more TERRIFYING?!?!

John is still making changes…he just ran out of the room to get a special crayon saying “Wet pants, coming up!”

Now I’m going to have peed pants in my Mothers Day Picture.

Sigh… Happy Mothers Day to me!

For the record…my kids have never seen The Walking Dead…we’ve told him that it’s a bad show with Zombies and is too scary for him.

Bright side, I’m totally kicking butt in this new world!

OPTIMUS EEYORE

 

OPTIMUSEEYORE

So I happened upon this information awhile back while on imdb.com  and my childhood memories and feelings clashed together with such glee and horror that there really isn’t a word in the english language to describe it.

The voice actor who portrays Optimus Prime has been voicing this character since the original cartoon aired in 1984.  Peter Cullen has been in voice acting for ages, it seems, and most of us grew up hearing his voice again and again.  We heard him in Votron, My Little Ponies, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, G.I. Joe, The Real Ghostbusters, Duck Tales, Rainbow Brite, and many more.  

It was a regular day of watching shows with my sons when I heard this voice again… only this time is was coming out of EEYORE!  Apparently Peter Cullen has been portraying Eeyore almost as long as Optimus Prime but I had never noticed.  I admittedly didn’t watch much Transformers but the voice of Optimus Prime stays with you.  I also admit that I DID watch a lot of Winnie the Pooh growing up, but I never made the connection.  

My world was officially blown.  Here are two characters that couldn’t be more opposed to each other.  Eeyore is like Optimus’ ANTITHESIS! 

Well, it just goes to show that Peter Cullen is amazing.  He is able to instill the greatest amount of hope and strength in his characters and the greatest amount of sympathy.  Here’s to you Mr. Cullen.  Thank you for giving me a very rich childhood!

Love! ❤ 

Check out Peter Cullen’s imdb page! Here

How Facebook Made and Broke My Year!

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Hi Everyone! Well, I have been all over social media in 2013 trying to figure what this whole mess is about.  Twitter was my vice, Tumblr was my biggest confusion, Pinterest was my greatest joy, WordPress was my biggest failure and Facebook was my biggest time leech and regret!

Let’s talk about Facebook for a minute.  I have had a love/hate relationship with it for some time now.  On the bright side, I met some of the best people in the world on Twitter and Facebook in the year 2012 and 2013, but I also experienced some of my greatest hurt as well.  I came to realize that for all the good that is out there, there is going to be those few people that make it miserable for everybody else.  There’s that one Sociopath that just can’t let you be happy.

Facebook is a breeding ground for immaturity and is run by Childish Politics.  You better line up with that bully or this will happen,  “I’m going to unfriend YOU because you wouldn’t let me abuse your family! Then I’ll  harass your family and post passive aggressive memes to gain sympathy for myself!”  The Passive Aggressive Bullying is Unchallenged and so pervasive that it makes a healthy heart sick.  You can’t even stand up for yourself against these people because they group together in clans and will lie, twist your words, slander your character and make it impossible for reason to have its victory. They are sneaky, manipulative and I’ve had enough.  ON TOP OF IT ALL, FB was also an administrative NIGHTMARE!  It was taking me forever to scroll through my newsfeed just to find that one post, from that one great friend.  Aggravating. 😦

I JUST WANT TO FIND MY FRIEND’S POST ON 15 WAYS TO COOK KALE!!!! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!?!?!   LOL!

So I’m taking the excellent advice I received from my best friend, ease off of any seriousness on FB.  I’ve decided to make this social media stuff work for me for a change.  I am sick of being Facebook’s *itch! I will be spending much more time here on WordPress sharing makeup, manicures, Geek Stuff, and now more family stuff.  I will also be using Twitter which will help save time because I can post my updates once!  I’m going to use Facebook in a more professional sense to protect my family from the Busybodies and Bullies, and also, so I can enjoy it for all the inspiration and love that it has the potential to offer.

Welcome back to my blog and I hope you have a great 2014!  Let’s make this year work for us, Friends!  Circumstance can kiss our lily white ones ❤

Special Thanks to the following people who have been an inspiration to me and who have kicked me when I needed it!

-My besties, Machie, Decca, and Gelanie for their unfailing love and mercy! LOL (not their real names)

-Cher-Ron  for understanding me and helping me despite understanding me! ;P (again not real name)

-@Keeba13, @MrsDarthKramer, @spacekicker, @SizzlerKistler for your undying ability to care for others! (real Tweeps and you should follow them on Twitter)

-Rhoda Joy and Jordan Kimble Charters for being an unstoppable positive force in this world! (also follow them @RhodaJoyOFFICIAL and @JKCharters)

-And of course, my Mom, for your loving devotion! ❤

Much Love! ❤

 

The Mother, The Two Year Old, and The Magna Doodle

MagnaDoodleA MUST READ: An Actual conversation between me and our 2 year old son this afternoon.

WARNING! THIS POST IS FULL OF PARENTAL HILARITY… try not to be offended.

Scene: Mother and 2yo sit on couch with a Magna Doodle

[Mother finishes first picture.]

Mother: What is this?

2yo: Elfant!

Mother: Good job! It’s an elephant!

[Mother erases picture]

Mother: Now what do you want me to draw?

2yo: Cock.

[Mother’s eyes widen but keeps her cool.]

Mother: What do you want me to draw?

2yo: Cock!

Mother: Cock?

[2yo looks at mother with irritation and enunciates with absolute clarity]

2yo: CO-CK!!!!!!

Mom: uhhhhh… Cock. You want me to draw a cock?

2yo: COCK! Yes. COCK-A-DOODLE-DOOOOOOO!

Mom: Oh. A rooster. Okay. One Cock, comin’ up!

[PLEASE TRY TO KEEP COMMENTS CLEAN… THIS POST HAS ENOUGH INNUENDOES TO KEEP US LAUGHING.]

Therefore, I am Iron Man.

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Science said it, so its true.

My sister-in-law shared this on Facebook and my life has changed forever.  I wish people would sign their work!  No proper credit can be given to the giver of this amazing revelation.  Thanks for sharing it, Sis!  I don’t know how you find these amazing things, but my heart is blessed. ❤

Best Observation, Ever!

This was shared on Nerd Clout today on Facebook and I couldn’t stand to let it stay there!

Prepare for your mind to explode…

via Nerd Clout

via Nerd Clout

Now scoop up your brains and put them back in your head and have a great weekend! ❤ XO

Master Potty Jedi

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Well, the 5yo did it!  It’s official, folks.   He has now mastered the potty.  I know the last couple of posts have been a little on the more serious side and that you can probably tell my heart is hurting quite a bit.  Well, 2013 has got to be our year because after nearly 2 years of fruitless potty training, our 5 yo son is not using the potty completely.

If you want to read how the victory started… check out my last post Tootsie Roll Factory Working Again! Thanks, Homeschooling.

I couldn’t believe that on March 4th I could be putting him in underwear, but the day after the post went up we tried it.  He has been in underwear for TWO WEEKS!  3 small pee accidents for waiting too long, and 2 poop accidents for being sick (I don’t really count those, but for posterity I list them 😉 LOL!).

Before all of this happened he used to complain about the “bad feelin’s”.  He would say things like “I don’t not

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