I am driven to talk about BULLYING because it is something that has followed me my whole life and it seems most people don’t even know that someone they care about is being bullied. So, I’m pulling together information that will help any of you that feel trapped in bullying situations or relationships.
Most childhood bullies choose a more subtle bullying lifestyle when they grow up, but they still have the emotional immaturity of a child. They are driven by Pride and Selfish Ambition. The world revolves around their happiness or lack there of. The type of bullying I want to talk about is The Passive Aggressive Bully. This bully would never risk an outright approach for fear of exposing themselves and ruining their carefully constructed image of perfection. They are brilliant manipulators and they are experts at orchestrating circumstances and people in their favor. When exposed they lash out and deny their mistakes and they will even lie to preserve themselves. The most difficult kind of bully is The Passive Aggressive bully.
- Obsessed with image
- Distorts truth and reality
- Plays the victim
- Pretends to care
This doesn’t mean that anyone who displays these behaviors or characteristics is a bully. It doesn’t mean that, because someone has treated you poorly, you are being bullied. This is just a list of traits that are not visible. They are subtle and are much more devastating if unavoided. I plan on having a series of posts dedicated to this. I will be pulling together from many different resources to bring you a full understanding of the bully, and his or her psychological state. I plan on sharing parts of my lifestory to give you a full understanding of how this type of bullying can affect a person and arrest their life from knowing success.
Bullies are the worst kind of sociopaths and they will fight you to social death. Usually, yours, because most targeted victims are too weak too fight back, are victims of past abuse, the costs of fighting back are too high, or they have a strong moral obligation that prevents them from doing so.
I hope to go through these characteristics one by one and give you examples of the behaviors that manifest because of them.
I highly recommend checking out the following websites if you are a victim of this kind of bullying.
Books Recommended by Leading Anti-Bullying Sites:
Mean Girls Grow Up: Adult Women Who Are Still Queen Bees, Middle Bees, and Afraid To Bees by Cheryl Dellasega PhD
Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls by Rachel Simmons
Beyond The Tears: A True Survivor’s Story by Lynn C. Tolson
Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls by Mary Pipher PhD
Toxic In-Laws: Loving Strategies for Protecting Your Marriage by Susan Forward
Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin by Anne Katherine
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field Nathaniel Branden
Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life by Martin Seligman
Passive Aggressive Bullying
Workplace or other, it’s wrong.
This site humorously refers to the workplace as The Mental Hospital where the patients run the show. However, it illuminates an area of BULLYING that is just as destructive as other forms.
The Passive Aggressive Bully
Please support all of us who have been brutalized by this form of bullying, by reading this article and standing up for those affected by it. It’s okay to walk away from a Passive Aggressive BULLY. Don’t encourage them by listening to them. Dont “Like” their FB posts that are Passive Aggressive. Dont “Favorite” their Passive Aggressive Tweets. Learn the difference between the genuine and ingenuine! This website helps sort out the subtleties of the Passive Aggressive Bully.
Help protect the victims, not the BULLY. If you recognize someone doing this, please step up and do what’s right. Confrontation will only cause problems and backlash, so just remove them from your life. Help victims by supporting their defenses and boundaries. The BULLY won’t stop their torment as long as they have people willing to tolerate them.
As far as Christians are concerned, Jesus would have never sat idly by or even encouraged this kind of BULLYING. He wouldnt and didn’t buddy-up with BULLIES. We can’t hide behind His name, call ourselves Peacemakers, and let an innocent be devastated to the point of suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts, or fatal suicide because of Passive Aggressive Bullying.
If you are this type of BULLY…you can stop. There’s help for people who want to stop bullying. Don’t let another minute go by where you are responsible for someone else’s pain.
FRIDAY FACES with Jen…
So when I was told as a teenager that I “didn’t have a face for modeling” and was told by dozens of peers that I was “so ugly” that they “wanted to cut my face off”… I think… compared to whom?
These women???? Listen ladies! We’re beautiful. God knows I don’t feel beautiful. I think I am ugly for most of the day. But I put aside that abuse, the wounds from it and my insecurities when my 5yo son tells me “Mommy. You’re beautiful. I want to stay with you forever.”
I won’t allow him to stay with me forever, but I will allow him to love me. And I’ll believe with him, that I am beautiful…even if I am only able to feel it a few times a day. It’s better than never feeling beautiful.
So when you feel down about your looks, just look at these poor girls who are being made a fool of for fashion’s sake and know that God cherishes His beautiful daughter that He fearfully and wonderfully made…YOU! ♥ Love you all!
-pictures found on www.marieclaire.co.uk
-disclaimer I understand this kind of fashion to some extent. Shoot! I love Cosplay. But these women are really being degraded and forced into an unhealthy lifestyle. It makes me very sad for those young girls 😦